Brent Stubbs has a great post over at Virtuous Planet calling on men to make marriage a priority:
Men have become immune to the relationship of marriage. What do I mean? I mean that men think that marriage magically happens. That one day Mrs. Right will come along their path and they will magically know that she is the magical one. When you look into her eyes, you will get that magical feeling and magically your bank account will have money for a ring, house and picket fence. Abracadabra, wify here I come!
All the while, many of these men put concerted and focused efforts so as to obtain numerous exploits: travel, education, friendships, professional accomplishments. They will lament that they have never “found” Mrs. Right, but they look for her like, well, a guy looks for anything in the refrigerator.
“Where’s the pickles?”
“Junior, all you need to do is move that jar there, and…”
The problem is that we don’t approach any relationship like the leftover cannoli in the fridge. Feel called to have kids? A certain, um, effort is required. Want a mentor? You may need to look for one. Desire a close friend? You probably shouldn’t turn your phone off after 6pm.
His post kind of reminds me of something I said here a few weeks ago:
“God will, for the most part, influence our coming into contact with a potentially suitable partner. But, then it is up to us to take action, to go out on a limb and open ourselves up to them in order to find out if they really are the one for us.”
That, of course, takes time away from other things we’ve got going on in our lives, but, if we are called to marriage, it’s something that we should make a priority. After all, the call to love resounding in our bodies invites us to go out of ourselves and to build a world together with another. “Man…cannot fully find himself except through a sincere gift of himself” Gaudium et Spes, 24
Previous post:
Don’t Be Too Long in Making Those Good Decisions
Other helpful advice:
How God works in bringing people together
Time is Not on My Side (Are you ‘too busy’ to get married?)