MJ makes some great points here (h/t Julie):
“If you’re not a bulldog about your career and that’s not your thing, it’s almost like you’re marginalized.” I hear that. Reminds me of this old post from Jenny Uebbing recounting a conversation she had with a friend of hers on why she, a smart, well educated young woman, could possibly want to be someone’s housewife (which she now is).
One Comment on “Careers vs. Baby-Making”
Well, Chelsea, I have mixed emotions here. I kind of feel like I’m eavesdropping on these sacrosanct female exchanges, but maybe a man’s perspective will…Oh, I don’t know…entertain, your readers.
First of all, this woman is right on the money. From the day you get your first cool lunch box, lipstick, highlights, brassiere, boyfriend, Beemer, or MBA, your gender is fiercely competitive. So, of course, is mine, but we settle our power struggles much more succinctly. A great part of this endemic female competition is to marginalize competitors. Certainly, the entire NOW movement has sought to diminish the importance of the world’s most important and worthwhile job. This is done, of course, by degree waving and “career” worship.
Now, I have a baseline philosophy, and that is this: EVERYTHING has a spiritual component. All human endeavor, no matter how mundane, moves us either toward or away from our purpose, which is, of course, To know love and serve God. So one need only ask oneself if MJ’s choices have moved her toward or away from that end.
Does “career” preclude family, certainly not, but the issue is one of priority. Once a parent (male or female) takes on that responsibility, ALL else is subordinate. This is intuitive, natural Godly, and practical.. Now, everyone knows that family is more important than job, but here (finally) is the crux of my comment. Aided by the diabolical genius of Satan, the competitive nature of the bitter souls who ushered in Birth Control, Abortion, and unmarried sexuality needed some rationale for trampling on the time honored dynamics of the male/ female relationship. presto! All of a sudden what we men used to call jobs, became…”CAREERS”!!!
No one would forgo marriage or kill a child in the womb, for a job, but for a “career”, my career, your career, THE career…well “harumpf”. But, here is the big secret. A career, is a body of work which survives the worker, the created collective works of someone who has contributed something exceptional to humanity. Mozart, Michaelangelo, and Frank Lloyd Wright had careers. Most of the rest of us have jobs. A brain surgeon or a rocket scientist or a pre school teacher may all elevate their jobs to extraordinary heights, but in reality the only “career” that survives most of us, the only real arm we leave is those who loved us…and why they did.
So, at the end of the day, if we insert the word “job” instead of “career” the question comes into clearer focus. If a woman asks herself if the choice is between a job and her life, a job and her heart, a job and her family, a job and her God, indeed, a job and her happiness, she will be much more apt to make wise decisions. Only a buffoon would question whether or not women are capable of succeeding and surpassing virtually everything we men do. And only a buffoon would fail to recognize the biological reality of the fact that a woman can do so much more.
“Housewife”… interesting word? How about…absolute center of a man’s love and fidelity, most important person in the world to those who absolutely depend upon her; nurturer, healer, chef, genius, lover and closest friend…yep…”housewife”. Quite an enviable career if you ask me!