Jill Stanek’s most recent weekend question was that ever-popular pro-choice, knee-jerk reaction to pro-life opposition: “So…Are pro-lifers going to adopt all the unwanted babies?” One of Jill’s followers on Facebook had several great responses. This one was my favorite:
Unwanted describes not the child but an attitude of some adults toward the child. The real problem isn’t unwanted children, but unwanting adults.
This is the selfishness that fuels the culture of death Men and women “unwanting” of the other if it means they must completely give of themselves, and it’s not just about the “unwanted” unborn children or the sick and the elderly who are a “burden” on society. Think of the marriages and other relationships that fail or fall apart because of clashing egos, for example. True love calls for total self donation. It means wanting the good of the other, even at the cost of the self. This is the meaning of the body. This is what it means to be human:
There is no such thing as unwanted human life. Unwanting men and women…now that’s another story.
“Man…cannot fully find himself except through a sincere gift of himself” Gaudium et Spes, 24
Therefore, in all things, let us learn how to daily die to ourselves, trust in the Lord and become true gifts of self to one another, especially the weak and most vulnerable members of our society.
2 Comments on “TOB Tues: Unwanted Children vs. Unwanting Adults”
So many times you’ll hear people say that marriage is all about compromise and that it’s 50/50, give and take. If we could take ourselves out of that mindset and focus of a sacrificial love that gives 100%, I think the divorce rate might be a little lower and there would be more “wanting” parents. We can’t claim ignorance when we have a “how to guide” in Ephesians 5. I’ll be the 1st to say that it’s hard to love like that in a 21st century marriage…some days require a constant death of self but the new life it brings into your marriage is worth it.