So, you’ve decided that you definitely do not want what the world has to offer in terms of sex. You’ve even read (or read about) and embraced John Paul II’s Theology of the Body. Now what?
Let’s face it, as beautiful and inspiring as the TOB is, it can seem a bit intimidating — like a lot to live up to. And, while it all sounds good in theory, it’s really hard to imagine how this can be possible in real life, especially if our image of sex has already been tainted by popular culture or our own past experience.
Last year I shared Trista’s brave, honest article about the anxiety she sometimes felt when she thought about her potential wedding night (this is now her inevitable wedding night as she has since gotten engaged — CONGRATULATIONS!!).
Recently I came across a post on Stephanie Calis’ Captive the Heart blog with advice to ease our fears about this kind of intimacy:
It seems to me that among our generation, there’s plenty of talk about sex in a general sense, both in the Church and in the culture, but not a lot of discussion about, well, the nitty gritty of lovin’. I’ve stumbled across a few Catholic sex blogs here and there, with well-intentioned advice, yet in my opinion (and it’s just my opinion, mind you), they leave something to be desired. They sometimes link to sources that are problematic or not credible, and the tone can strike me as lofty and elevated at a time when just getting real might be more effective.
Read more for her helpful suggestions.
Be not afraid! Believe me, I’m speaking as much to myself here as to anyone else (and, yes, in case you’ve ever wondered, but were afraid to ask, people with spinal cord in juries can still have sex…and babies.)
One Comment on “Be Not Afraid of Sex”
Good points Chelsea. “… our image of sex has already been tainted by popular culture or our own past experience.” I’d probably go further and say: Our popular culture’s image of sex serves as the prevailing stereotype in American society and churches today, not a biblical image or one centered in Christian ethics. That’s why I think it’s important to guard our hearts, including our ears, eyes, and thoughts. One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Philippians 4:8: “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” We live in a world that has turned something beautiful and lovely into something dirty and secretive. A few people in my church know about my 52 years of celibacy and calling. One family lady recently told me: “John, you know you’re a fairy tale that’s not supposed to be here. These young folks could never fathom your existence.” Another older gentleman told me, “I don’t think you belong in a Baptist church. Men your age are married. Why don’t you go over and join the Catholics?” Even if I was declared an extraterrestrial tomorrow, I know I’m following God’s will for my life. Nothing can change that.